My Deepest Condolences: Meaning, Messages and Examples

"My deepest condolences" is one of the most common ways to express sympathy in a card, text or email. It is correct and respectful for almost any loss, but on its own it can feel a little formal. Adding one personal line after it makes the message sound like you.

Below is what the phrase means, how to finish the sentence, and messages for a friend, coworker, client or relative, for the loss of a parent, spouse, child or pet, for texts and flower cards, and for families of faith.

Article contents

• How to Use "My Deepest Condolences" in a Card
• What "My Deepest Condolences" Means
• My Deepest Condolences Messages
• "My Deepest Condolences to You and Your Family" Messages
• Deepest Sympathy Messages
• Deepest Condolences Messages by Relationship
• Messages for the Loss of a Parent, Spouse, Child or Pet
• Short Condolence Messages for Texts, Flowers and Social Media
• Religious Condolence Messages and Bible Verses
• Other Ways to Say "My Deepest Condolences": Alternative Messages
• How to Sign a Condolence Card
• Frequently Asked Questions

How to Use "My Deepest Condolences" in a Card

1. Open with the phrase. Write "My deepest condolences" followed by the loss, such as "on the loss of your father" or "to you and your family."
2. Add one specific detail. A memory, a quality you admired or a way the person touched your life keeps the message from sounding like a form letter.
3. Offer support you can follow through on. "I am here if you need anything" is kind, and a specific offer, such as bringing dinner on Thursday, is often easier for a grieving person to accept.
4. Close warmly and sign your full name. "With sympathy," "With love" or "Thinking of you" all work, followed by your name.

Example: "My deepest condolences to you and your family. Your dad coached my son for three seasons, and he never missed a chance to encourage him. We are thinking of you. With sympathy, the Harris family"

What "My Deepest Condolences" Means

Condolences are expressions of sympathy for someone who is grieving. "My deepest condolences" means "I am very sorry for your loss," and the word "deepest" shows that you mean it sincerely. It works for almost any loss and any relationship, from a close friend to a coworker or client.

"My deepest condolences" and "deepest sympathy" mean the same thing. "Condolences" is a little more formal, so it suits business notes, emails and people you do not know well. "Sympathy" sounds slightly softer and is common on flower cards, as in "With deepest sympathy." "My sincere condolences" and "my deepest sympathies" are also correct.

My Deepest Condolences Messages

These messages start with "my deepest condolences" and then finish the sentence with something specific. Replace the names and details with your own.

• My deepest condolences on the loss of your father. He was a good man, and I will miss him.
• My deepest condolences to you. Your mom was one of the kindest people I have ever met.
• My deepest condolences on the passing of your husband. I will always remember how he greeted everyone at the door with a smile.
• My deepest condolences. Please know how much she was loved by everyone at church.
• My deepest condolences on the loss of your grandmother. I know how close you were and how much you will miss your Sunday visits.
• My deepest condolences. I will always remember his laugh and his stories.
• My deepest condolences on the loss of [Name]. The neighborhood will miss her garden and her kind words.
• My deepest condolences for your loss. I am bringing dinner on Thursday, so please do not worry about cooking that night.

"My Deepest Condolences to You and Your Family" Messages

Use these when you are writing to a spouse, parent or adult child who is grieving with the rest of the family, or when you want one card to include everyone.

• My deepest condolences to you and your family. We are all thinking of you.
• My deepest condolences to you and your family on the loss of your mother.
• My deepest condolences to you and your family. Please let me know how I can help this week.
• My deepest condolences to you and your family. He will be missed by so many people.
• My deepest condolences to you and your family. I am so sorry you are going through this.
• My deepest condolences to you and your family. I feel lucky to have known her for so many years.

Deepest Sympathy Messages

"With deepest sympathy" and "my deepest sympathies" are softer ways to say the same thing. These deepest sympathy messages work in any sympathy card.

• With deepest sympathy to you and your family.
• My deepest sympathies on the loss of your mother. She always made me feel welcome.
• Please accept my deepest sympathy. I am thinking of you today and in the weeks ahead.
• Our deepest sympathies to your family. [Name] will be missed by everyone who knew him.
• Our deepest sympathies. Please let us know if there is anything we can do, even weeks from now.

Deepest Condolences Messages by Relationship

These examples are sorted by who you are writing to. For more workplace wording, see our guide to expressing sympathy at work.

Messages for a Friend

• My deepest condolences, my friend. I am so sorry, and I am only a phone call away, day or night.
• I am so sorry about your dad. My deepest condolences to you. I will call this weekend to check on you.
• My deepest condolences. You took such good care of your mom, and I know she felt it every day.

Messages for a Coworker

• My deepest condolences on the loss of your mother. Please take the time you need.
• My deepest condolences from all of us on the team. We are thinking of you.
• My deepest condolences. I am here if you want to talk or take a walk at lunch.

Messages for Your Boss

• My deepest condolences on the loss of your father. We are all thinking of you.
• Please accept my deepest condolences. I hope you can take the time you need with your family.
• My deepest condolences to you and your family. You have always looked out for our team, and we are all thinking of you now.

Messages for a Client or Business Contact

• Please accept our deepest condolences. We were very sorry to learn of your loss.
• On behalf of everyone at our office, please accept our sincere condolences.
• Our deepest condolences to you and your family. Please take all the time you need.

Messages for a Neighbor

• My deepest condolences. [Name] was a wonderful neighbor, and we will miss seeing him on his morning walks.
• My deepest condolences. She always had a wave and a kind word for our kids, and they will miss her.

Messages for a Family Member

• My deepest condolences, Aunt Linda. Uncle Joe was the heart of every family gathering, and we will miss him so much.
• I am so sorry, cousin. My deepest condolences. Grandma was so proud of you.
• My deepest condolences. Losing Dad is hard for all of us, and I am so glad we have each other.

Messages for the Loss of a Parent, Spouse, Child or Pet

These examples name the loss directly. For more ideas, see our sympathy messages for the loss of a mother, the loss of a father and the loss of a husband or wife.

Messages for the Loss of a Mother

• My deepest condolences on the loss of your mother. She raised a wonderful family, and her love shows in all of you.
• My deepest condolences. Your mom always made me feel welcome, and I will never forget the meals she shared with us.

Messages for the Loss of a Father

• My deepest condolences on the loss of your father. He was a hard worker and a generous friend to so many people.
• My deepest condolences. Your dad taught me how to fish, and I will think of him every time I am out on the lake.

Messages for the Loss of a Husband or Wife

• My deepest condolences on the loss of your husband. The two of you shared a beautiful life together.
• My deepest condolences. I am thinking of you, and I will be here for you in the quiet weeks after the funeral.

Messages for the Loss of a Child

When a child dies, keep the message short and gentle. Use the child's name if you know it, and do not try to explain the loss.

• My deepest condolences. We are so sorry about [Name], and we are holding your family close.
• My deepest condolences. There are no words for a loss like this. We love you and we are here for you.
• My deepest condolences. We will always remember [Name] and the joy [he/she] brought to everyone.

Messages for the Loss of a Pet

• My deepest condolences on the loss of [Pet's Name]. She was such a good companion to you.
• My deepest condolences. [Pet's Name] was part of your family, and I know how much you will miss her.

Our pet sympathy messages have more wording for the loss of a dog or cat.

Short Condolence Messages for Texts, Flowers and Social Media

A text, social media comment or florist card has room for only a line or two. These short messages work in all three. For more flower card wording, see our sympathy flower card messages.

• My deepest condolences. Thinking of you.
• My deepest condolences to you and your family.
• With deepest sympathy.
• So sorry for your loss. My deepest condolences.
• My deepest condolences. Sending love to your whole family.
• My deepest condolences. [Name] will be missed.
• Deepest condolences from all of us.
• My deepest condolences. May [Name] rest in peace.

On social media, keep a comment short and save anything personal for a private message. A handwritten card afterward gives you room to say more.

Religious Condolence Messages and Bible Verses

If the family shares your faith, a short prayer or blessing can be a comfort. Our Christian condolence messages and religious sayings for sympathy cards have more ideas.

• My deepest condolences. I am praying for you and your family.
• My deepest condolences. May God give you comfort and peace in the days ahead.
• My deepest condolences to you and your family. We are thanking God for [Name]'s life and praying for all of you.
• My deepest condolences. May the Lord hold you close and give you strength.

These Bible verses (NIV) can follow your message:

• The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. (Psalm 34:18)
• Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. (Matthew 5:4)
• He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. (Psalm 147:3)
• He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. (Revelation 21:4)

Other Ways to Say "My Deepest Condolences": Alternative Messages

If "my deepest condolences" feels too formal, any of these messages say the same thing in plainer words.

• Please accept my sincere condolences.
• My sincere condolences to you and your family.
• I was heartbroken to hear the news.
• I am grieving with you.
• Your family has been on my mind all week.
• My heart goes out to you.
• May the coming weeks bring you some peace.
• I am so sorry. He meant a lot to so many people.
• There is nothing I can say to fix this, but I am so sorry.

How to Sign a Condolence Card

After your message, choose a closing that matches how well you know the person. "With sympathy," "With deepest sympathy" and "Sincerely" work for coworkers, clients and acquaintances. "With love," "Love always" and "Thinking of you" fit close friends and family, and "With prayers" suits a family who shares your faith.

Sign your first and last name unless the family knows you well, since grieving families often receive many cards. For a couple, sign both names or write "The Harris Family." Our guide on how to sign a card has more closings.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the difference between "condolences" and "sympathy"?

They mean almost the same thing. "Sympathy" is the feeling of sorrow for someone else's loss, and "condolences" are the words you use to express it. Both are correct in a card.

Is "my deepest condolences" too formal for a friend?

It is fine, but for a close friend it helps to add something personal after it. You can also write "I am so sorry" instead, which sounds warmer.

Can I text "my deepest condolences"?

A text is fine for a quick first message, especially when you hear the news right away. A handwritten card afterward means more, and many families keep them.

How do you respond when someone says "my deepest condolences"?

You do not need to say much. "Thank you," "Thank you, that means a lot" or "Thank you for thinking of us" are all fine. If the note came with a card or flowers, our funeral thank you messages have wording for a thank you card later.

Is it "condolence" or "condolences"?

Both are correct, but "condolences" is more common in cards. Write "My deepest condolences" or "Please accept my condolences."

For more ideas, see our condolence messages for a sympathy card, short sympathy messages and grief quotes for sympathy cards, or use the Message Finder.

Our sympathy cards and Bible Verse sympathy cards are blank inside, so you have room to write your own message.